Pain….

Ugh, tired of losing my mind, living in brain fog, dealing with pain that won’t let me sleep! Tired of people that think that I’m ok when I am in pain and choose not to say anything. Tired of finally complaining about pain and being treated like its either a new thing (because I haven’t said anything for a while) or that I’m whining. I’m not a attention whore, I have always been a hard worker, I always took pride in trying to be an expert at my work. Being told that I have to do something about it, snap out of it, push through it. I’ve been dealing with pain for many many years, don’t they think I know the difference between pain I can fight and pain I can’t? Don’t they see that my admitting I have pain is so that I can get some understanding and help with things I can’t do because of the fatigue and pain? So basically, you don’t want to hear about it, deal with it or understand it, you would rather I just shut up and get things done?!? Don’t you think I want it to go away? Every thing I do takes energy out of me, there isn’t anything putting energy back in. Meds only do so much, they have side effects, some can be deadly if not taken correctly, most make me sleepy. Combine sleepiness, fatigue, and pain, and I could easily sleep for another six hours a day and not blink. And people wonder why I’m depressed!

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